Feb 6, 2007

"Am Lady Peggy Morrison, suffering from cancerous ailment. I am a widow my husband Sir Richard Morrison an Englishman who is dead. My husband was into private practice all his life before his death. My husband and I made a vow to uplift the down-trodden and the less-privileged individuals as he had passion for people who can not help themselves due to physical disability or financial predicament. I can adduce this to the fact that he needed a Child from this relationship, which never came.When my late husband was alive he deposited the sum of 20 Million (twenty Million Great Britain Pounds Sterling which were derived from his vast estates and investment in capital market with his bank here in UK. Presently, this money is still with the Bank.Recently, my Doctor told me that I have limited days to live due to the cancerous problems I am suffering from. I have decided to donate this fund to you and want you t I took this decision because I do not have any child that will inherit this money. please assure me that you will act just as I have stated herein. Hope to hear from you thanks. contact my"

And she picked me! ME! Oh the kindness of strangers, oh the loveliness of those more fortunate than me! I got this email from Lady Peggy, and jumped for joy! I mean I am sorry the old crone is on her last legs and all, but give me the money, baby!

The only problem is she told me to act as she has 'stated herein'. (And all this time I thought that was a bird!) Oh, wait that's heron. My bad. I am just wondering how she wants me to act? Grave and sad? Joyous and happy? Humble and grateful? Wonder if I fly over there she'll serve me tea and those little cakes and shit? Oh, well. I guess I will never know. I must pass on this most generous offer. How can I take advantage of this dying old lady, knowing full well she is probably delusional with all the chemo drugs floating around in her poor failing body? That would be a sin. That would almost be akin to scamming someone, or trying to con them out of their money. Hell, I am not a politician, I can't do that shit to someone!

Wonder how come she doesn't live in Nigeria with all the other rich folks? Oh, well, that's a discussion for another day, I guess. Hey, but you guys cross your fingers! She just might pick your name out of a hat!!


Loving Annie said...

Okay, so I'm totally baffled. Was this genuine -- or a complete scam ??? I'm so literal, and always assume people are telling the truth. Maybe it's tooearly in the morning to be cynical. Maybe it's too early in the morning not to feel pity for someone dying of cancer. Maybe I thought for just a moment it was awesome that you were going to get lots of money, and have it make some of your dreams come true...

Spadoman said...

You mean you didn't e-mail her back and tell her you'd be delighted to take the money and disperse it to charity?

All she wanted was your bank account number so she could deposit the money, ( and rip you off for all you'll let her take).

I love the scam that says that they have the oil well and just need a place to hide the money and they'll pay you three million to use your bank.

A good laugh for a cold day. Thanks Just Me!

BRUNO said...

I'm just afraid that she might pull my name from somewhere other than her HAT....!

The Future Was Yesterday said...

For some reason, I've been getting the "God has told me to bless you" variety lately. I'm also seeing a ton of "Help! I'm stuck in Iraq with millions of Saddam's cash!"

Some of them are pretty funny!:)

Mary said...

That was funny. I always get the ones from Nigeria.

just me said...

loving annie, the first time I received one of these was shortly after my son died in Iraq, and all I saw were the names Youngblood and Iraq. It was devasting to learn that it had nothing to do with my son, but with some asshole trying to get my account numbers (so as to transfer the money, yeah, right!). I was furious.

There are people out there with tons of money, and with cancerous ailments. Most people in these circumstances 1) leave their money to their relatives, cats, a foundation, or whatever. And,2) with a cancerous ailment, you are too damned busy trying to stay alive. I know.

Whatever you do, don't ever answer any email that sounds to good to be true. My philosophy has always been, if it looks like a duck, walks like duck, acts like a duck, well, I believe it is most certainly a duck. You sound like a very loving and caring person, and that's exactly who they want to target.

Bruno: I worry about you sometimes. Now, you tell me, where else do you think she was going to pull your name? Out of her ass? You devil you.

Loving Annie said...

Just Me,
I will NOT answer any e-mails from epople I don't know. Thank you for protecting me !
(That is sad about what that person did to you when your son had died in Iraq. It stinks.)
Boy, I am shocked at how naiive I was. It never entered my head that she might be lying !
Oh---kay. Well, never too late to learn wisdom !
I must have skipped over the part where she asked for your bank account -- because THAT would have made a light bulb go on over my trusting head and I would have seen it 'quack" like a duck immediately !!!

BRUNO said...

Hey Deb, don't worry about me! I'm done gone too far over the brink to salvage anyway! Focus your energy on the "normal" people, if you can figure out who, or what normal is.......!

Fuzzylogic said...

Lol,I sometimes wonder how is it these scammers do get the email I.D's?Aren't we blessed to be in a world where people want to go offering money to complete strangers,maybe there's hope at the end of the tunnel for humanity!
Stragely all the ones I get are those "Please forward this or else you will die" and "you have just won a million dollars in lottery" kinds inspite of not having ever bought a lottery myself:)Lol,so far I'm hale and healthy and nothing has befallen me because I refused to forward it or part with my bank account number and just dumped them into the trash and flushed them off.These scammers are innovative!

Anonymous said...

I got the email tonight, as usual thought why don't I put this jerk's email into my work's current promotion.
Then they will send stacks of email. Of course I'm not like that so just marked it as spam before plugging into google to find you!

just me said...

anonymous, it would have been a little on the fun side, though. Glad your a person of good moral conduct. Whatever that means anymore.