What is it? What does it really mean to each one of us? I would like to say I am having a bit of a crisis of faith, but would it be true? I still believe. But I am very angry today, at that which I call god.
When we pray, do we expect to get exactly what we pray for or just a tidbit, a few crumbs of what we ask? Seems my whole life I have settled for a few crumbs. I believe there is a song along those lines. I have prayed and asked for interventions. I have said if I believe, if my faith is strong enough, then you will answer.
There was a time when I lived in Pensacola FL with two toddlers in tow, and a husband who spent most of his time away from home. (You can't hardly blame him...a wife pulling her hair out, and two little boys running around getting into everything.) Any way, I prayed one day. I prayed for money for milk and cereal, and eggs, and just enough to get us through until payday. When the mailman came, I got a check for $10 from Publisher's Clearing House. I was overjoyed, and disappointed. Why could not the check have been for 10,000 dollars? But it was for 10, and at that time, it was enough to get us through. This was faith. Though some would make a good argument for luck, or chance, or coincidence.
What would you call it? Do we pray and expect more than what we pray for? Do we have to be very specific in our prayers, or can we still make a generalized prayer? Do we spend enough time being grateful for what we have, and not whining about what we don't have? The questions have rumbled through my brain all day like some unwelcome guest at a get-to-gether for close friends. Can it just be that god answered my prayer and I didn't like the answer?
Lots of questions here today, folks. Any answers would be most welcome. Any thoughts at all?