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Aug 17, 2007

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I'm back after fighting with my modem for the past two days. It was a fearsome sight to behold. It had me down for the count one time, but I put it in a head lock, while wrestling it to the floor, and finally got the upperhand. I will be one happy camper when my broadband comes home to stay.

Bruno left something in my comments section about how I needed to get my life back before I became the neighborhood sucker. (That doesn't sound right, does it? But I know what he means.)  If I didn't have to wait an hour and a half for the page to load, I would call it back up, and quote it word for word, but its on the post second before this one. And, he speaks the truth. Now, I wish he would just move in here for about two or three weeks and help me. HA!  No, I don't need any help, as I am the devil.  (I probably should quit saying that, it gives me a weird feeling inside.) Like I've just had tea with George Bush and he was talking about the latest book he read, "Tip and Mitten".

 "See, Tip is this little dog, cute little rascal, and Mitten is a cat, also cute, don't get me wrong, but there's something about that cat, might be an insurgent, don't know, gonna talk to Daddy about it...get some feedback...got to  jump right on this thing!" 

Well, I found myself volunteering to babysit for two 10 year old boys. It started out as a get them on the bus to school type of situation, and I thought, yeah, I can handle that, but school doesn't start for three or four weeks. (Slap on the forehead! Ouch!!) The young lady is trying so hard to get custody of her children again, and I want to help, so badly, that I have also volunteered to be a witness at the proceedings.  I should be locked in my room with a month full of mystery books, and not allowed to leave.

I took her to work, and the plan was to have the boys come over here when they woke up, as her "friend" cannot stay there while she has her children with her. Her decision, no one elses. So, C comes here.  You remember C?  Got his car repo'ed? When I got home, C hadn't gone to work, and my favorite neighbor of all time, you guessed it, was already here talking to my son, and to use the phone. Now, if all I had to worry about was me, the conversation would have probably been short and sweet. Get the fuck out of my house, you, over there, on the phone. But, I also have my son, who for whatever reason values this woman, and as I want him in my life always, I will make certain accommodations for those he cares about.  And that's just how it will be. This is a decision I made two years ago, and I may gripe about it, but usually I relate these stories for their humorous appeal, rather than their gripe factor. If I wanted to gripe, gosh, there is so many more worthy things to choose from, the list is endless. I wouldn't know where to start.

All through my life I have met and enjoyed the company of some fairly odd and strange people. They are drawn to me, or vice-versa, and I have learned a great deal from them. Some of it was even beneficial. But never have we spent a day window shopping, or fixing each other's hair, or doing whatever it is that normal people do. As you can see, I am guessing here.

So, where was I? Ah,  the babysitting, which I had volunteered to do...Well, C said he would watch them, as he wasn't working, and he was going to take them fishing. I wrestled with the modem, and learned that C had let the boys go to the Butt girl's house to play with her demon child. Ok, ok, that is so mean, even I take offense.  He is not a demon child.  He just acts like one. No, he has issues.  Its just that sometimes I look at him and I think there goes a future Ted Bundy.  I somehow picture him with a box of little animal bones buried somewhere in the woods close by. When a lady stopped and asked if I had seen two little dogs that were missing, it was all I could do to keep from shrieking, "Oh, God, They're in the box!  Good God, in heaven, they're in the box!!"  I just said I would watch for them. (They're in the box.)

Well, of course demon child came back with the two boys, and spent the day with them, which made their mom quite angry as they were not supposed to go there, and C caught hell, but it should have been me, and why, I'm not sure. There, now that makes perfect sense I know.

Tension is in the air, though, not from me, but a show-down between two moms of 10 year olds, and when the forces collide in fury and thunderous energy, I hope I am at Food Lion or somewhere safe, deciding between a plain chocolate bar or one with almonds.

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20 comments:

Unknown said...

Food lion? You must be kidding. Get your passport ready go somewhere safe . How about visiting me here in India?

Woozie said...

Screw babysitting.

alphonsedamoose said...

You should know better than to VOLUNTEER to babysit, especially with Butt girl around

Anonymous said...

Bruno said.....
"Ain't none of my business here, but I agree with Shrink: You need to get YOUR home, and YOUR life back before you become an all-day sucker, for seven-days straight!"

I just read it. I'm a little behind with my reading.

Unknown said...

I am too, and my blog is playing tricks on me. I just deleted my comment that was posted twice three times and its still there. something wicked this way comes..

Unknown said...

Now, it disappeared completely.

SJ, would love to come see you, but its hard enough to prove who I am to cash a check, let alone get a passport...

woozie, you took the words out of my own mouth.

moose, I know, only idiots volunteer, so I guess that makes me what, a volunteer?

Anonymous said...

You wrote "All through my life I have met and enjoyed the company of some fairly odd and strange people. They are drawn to me."

You're not talking about US are you?

Unknown said...

What an odd and strange thing to say! Of course not. Actually, I was talking about my family, you know, brothers and sisters, aunts and uncles, cousins, stuff like that...

Wow, think quick on my feet don't I?

Anonymous said...

My ex used to tell me I attracted the oddest and strangest people. When I look back I see that it's true.

Anonymous said...

Ha! You're a wierdo magnet! So am I. Dogs and kids like me too. They see right through me and know I'm a sucker.

SpongyBones said...

This is the reason I never babysit. Mom's hate me, children hate me ... see they would be all after me and no Food Lion could keep me safe!

Unknown said...

Anne, Babzy, only good people attract the strange and unusual.

Spongy..nope, Food Lion is full of Moms and kids, so you would probably be pelted with pudding pops.

Catmoves said...

I have no idea what a Food Lion is. Is that a lion who eats all your food? Or a food fit for a lion? Or a place to go to feed the lion?
See, you do get "fairly odd and strange people" visiting your site. Baby sitting should be reserved for grandparents, 'cause they can always snarl: "OK. Take your kid(s) home. Now."

Catmoves said...

I still love your Blair Mountain post. More, more.

Nick said...

Glad you are back...missed you over at the house.

BRUNO said...

Hate to tell her I've just now gotten here to read her blog! And all this after I find that she THINKS I know what I'm talkin' about!

Maybe I can sneak in the back door here, she'll never read THIS FAR down!

Shit!!! There she is.......!!!

Enemy of the Republic said...

I've had computer woes, but I want to thank you for all the helpful messages you left on my blog. You are one in a million.

Unknown said...

Catmoves: A Food Lion is a giant grocery store that sells a lot of chocolate.

Bruno: Don't you know I have eyes in the back of my head?? I can hear flies land on a leaf a lettuce two miles away? And I always carry a cast iron skillet under my apron? Well, not always. Sometimes I go with the stainless steel. But you get my drift!!

Enemy: Thanks, but you didn't say on in a million of what! However, I believe its a good thing. Ever the optomist.

Queenie said...

Two 10 year olds, what a brave lady you are (I think brave is the right word). Friends like you are hard to find, make sure you take care of you!

Catmoves said...

I need Food Lions then. Everybody needs Food Lions. Chocolate, chocolate, chocolate. Manna.
I've been reading about the problems that are cropping in Internet providers on cable TV. They're reaching a problem of gigantic proportions. Comcast has gone so far as to put a block on BitTorrent.
Apparently this is not yet affecting satellite providers. Get a good modem this time. Nothing made in China.